| theres a fine line between good and evil |
[05 Oct 2004|11:01am] |
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mood |
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 content |
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Yeah I'm not going to be hanging out with anyone anytime soon. Not a big loss for all of you is it now? The only person I want to be with...........I love him so much. I believe in a god now. God will surley find a way, a way around evil. Evil is what put us here in the first place
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| My Mistakes... |
[29 Sep 2004|03:46pm] |
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mood |
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 drained |
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...is what have lead me here once again in the same situation only a different time period. Someone would think maybe I would of caught on the first time, but no I have to go on and on and on doing the same stupid things. All because I think that if I dont, people would think lower of me on the social ladder.
All because of what people think once again...and I didnt even realize it.
I'm digging my own grave
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| Does he love me like I love him??? |
[27 Sep 2004|01:08pm] |
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mood |
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 distressed |
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I wish that I could read into the future to see what path I choose and what decisions I make so I don't fuck up anymore, ya know? I guess there wouldn't be any excitement to life then if everybody knew what their future prevailed. I'm just sick to my stomach thinking about how easily I could fuck this up and ruin everything I have put into it from day 1. Sometimes I just get caught up in the moment and I'm only human, so I do make mistakes. I will be overcome with different decisions and choices to make, I'm just terrified that I'll make all the wrong ones.
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| My emoness... |
[26 Sep 2004|11:11am] |
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mood |
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 loved |
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Ok so last night was the best night I have ever had in like 4 months. It was honestly the happiest I had been in a long time.
I'm still getting butterflies from thinking about it... ^.^
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| Its hard to notice... |
[23 Sep 2004|06:22am] |
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mood |
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 indifferent |
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I think I made the wrong decision...so I'm going to try and fix it today. Having someone as a friend is better than nothing at all.
Soo yeah, hung out with Chantell yesterday.
Someone is gunna fuckin die...the person who im'ed me and said it was Blake. I will find out whos responsible and I will take action. It was nothing that big but it was big enough to piss me off. Who ever did it was a fucking retard, I mean they couldn't even have the balls to make fun of me or whatever they were doing to my face and actually show who they are. Dont you agree that that means they're pussy's? I dont see why they wouldn't confront me, unless they're scared or something. Eh I have an idea who it is and if it is those ppl then yeah............................
So I'm relaxed right now
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| My... |
[19 Sep 2004|03:02pm] |
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mood |
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 recumbent |
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| I still love him |
[19 Sep 2004|09:37am] |
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mood |
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Anxious |
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THANK YOU ANDRA!!!! You helped me the most and it really did help!
Its made my day to hear those simple words...
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| My Today |
[19 Sep 2004|08:04am] |
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mood |
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 Love Sick |
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Goin to Ren Fest today with Chantell and my mommy. Maybe Ryan too if I decide to call him or if he gets on. I think I'm going to get my homecoming dress there. It'd deffinatly be different than everyone else's. Ehh we'll see...
Went to Bretts last night with Kimmie and Terra. Josh and some guy Jeremy were there and we watched From Hell with Johnny Depp *drools* pure hottness. It was good I liked it.
I had the weirdest dream last night. I was trying not to get killed by these electric tornados that I swear were following me. I was really terrified I think because the dream was pretty real. I was trying to find someone ,whom I will not name, and give them a note I wrote them because they wanted one from me. I never did find them in my dream, I wish I had. But anyways I think the tornados were following me because of my cell phone. It was weird.
God I wish he didnt say "I'm not ready to talk to her" because I would just call him... I dunno what to do.
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| Its trust |
[17 Sep 2004|08:26pm] |
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mood |
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 weird |
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He thinks it could never happen again...well no ones for sure on anything unless they try and fail or succed. I want to think it would, but then I look at all the problems that would come out of it. I would rather have to deal with all the problems then live without him for the rest of my life. Maybe this is just part of getting over it but I feel this way and I have since the end of us. If only he wouldn't focus on the past so much and learn to see how much I'v changed since the last time we were together.
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| Will he ever walk the line?... |
[16 Sep 2004|11:56am] |
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mood |
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 restless |
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I got some very interesting and potentual exciting news yesterday.
"I dont know know what you expect me to say but I know for a fact that I still love you, and I dont think I ever stopped." -just practicing for the real thing
I hope he'll still talk to me...and soon
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[15 Sep 2004|04:21pm] |
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mood |
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 bitchy |
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| One word to describe you |
[15 Sep 2004|03:59pm] |
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mood |
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bitchy |
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This is me \/ good job mmhmmm
I got a fucking prank phone call...if I find out who did that Imma kick their scrawnny little assss...Im not taking any shit right now
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| My Morning |
[15 Sep 2004|08:53am] |
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mood |
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 excited |
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waiting....wanting more time with you
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| My tomorrow |
[14 Sep 2004|08:57pm] |
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mood |
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giddy |
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Thayers coming to school with me tomorrow for the whole day. Its awesome cause hes skippin school for me! :-) Just so happens I'm talking to him on the phone at this very moment. Hes alright. I would like him better if he thought my chihuahua was cute. Hes funny though.
Im gunna do powder-puff for the alt. which is gunna be interesting. Chantell and Kimmie are the only other two girls I know of doing it so far. I hope that we can do it...did I mention I hate football?
I know I mentioned that Kates my hero.
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| Kate Kate Kate Kate Kate Kate Kate Kate Kate |
[13 Sep 2004|04:44pm] |
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mood |
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 Hot...for some Kate |
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I want to be just like Kate...Shes my idol...Everyone should be just like her...In every way...Even right down to the crabs and the lobsters in her eyebrows...Along with her sexy silver,yellowish,purple hair...
*drools*
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| My weekend went peachy... |
[13 Sep 2004|12:42pm] |
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mood |
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 accomplished |
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So I think I like this one guy named Thayer, some of you reading this may have met him already. He was the really tall guy with long black hair at my fire. He thinks Davison kids are gay cause they try to hard to be cool which I agree with him on 100%. I admit I used to be just like that, and I sometimes still do things to make people think I'm cool. I'm happy though at the moment. He called me last night and I thought he was gunna be like is Chantell there since she was over here the whole weekend and theyre best friends, but he wanted to talk to me. It made my night, so we talked for like 2 hours. Then we both had to go so we could watch Adult Swim and not be distracted.
I stayed home from school today so I can get my homework done that I didnt do over the weekend, and to clean my messy ass room.
I'm too tired to be on here...I'mma go take a nap. Later
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| Beg so deeply |
[11 Sep 2004|03:00pm] |
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mood |
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grateful |
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i am my best friend...
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assassinate_me's journal
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